TOP 10 FILMS

10 Screen Villains That I Wouldn’t Let Date My Sister

Garland Greene1. GARLAND GREENE (CON AIR).

Played by Steve Buscemi in Con Air, Garland Greene is a convicted serial killer serving consecutive life sentences for 30 murders. He states that real insanity is working at an office for 50 hours a week until retiring and ending up in a retirement village hoping to die before one can no longer make it to the toilet on time. Furthermore, he claims that he once drove through three states wearing a girl’s head as a hat. His rendition of “He’s Got The Whole World In His Hands” is a little creepy and harrowing. A stellar performance by Buscemi!

Waingro 2. WAINGRO (HEAT).

Played by Kevin Gage in Heat, Waingro is the personification of evil! As well as engaging in high-profile armed robberies, he seemingly moonlights as a serial rapist/killer of young prostitutes on the streets of Los Angeles. Gage makes Buffalo Bill in The Silence of the Lambs seem like Bambi.

Eugene Victor Tooms 3. EUGENE VICTOR TOOMS (THE X-FILES).

Played by Doug Hutchison in The X-Files, Tooms is a genetic-mutant serial killer capable of squeezing his body through narrow spaces. His unique bone and muscle structures allow extreme contortion and elongation of his body. He also has an incredibly low metabolic rate which allows him to slip into hibernation periods lasting 30 years at a time. Hutchison’s portrayal of Tooms might have you leaving the bathroom light on at night.

Night Slasher 4. NIGHT SLASHER (COBRA).

Played by Brian Thompson in Cobra, the Night Slasher earned his nickname by roaming the streets late at night, preying on civilians at random, and ultimately killing his victims through the wielding of sharp, inhumane objects. Only Stallone in all his glory comes between the Night Slasher and his next victim!

Stansfield Leon 5. DETECTIVE STANSFIELD (LEON).

Played by Gary Oldman in Leon, Stansfield might seem a rather out-of-place choice in this list; however, I never said anything about my candidates being mass murderers. Oldman’s depiction of a detective-turned-sociopath (with his pill popping and predilection for Mozart) is truly disturbing and unforgettable, and certainly qualifies as someone I don’t want to encounter any time soon.

Charles Rane 6. CHARLES RANE (PASSENGER 57).

Played by Bruce Payne in Passenger 57, a film that has rightfully never exactly been regarded as a classic, the character of Charles Rane, AKA “The Rane of Terror”, was certainly a highlight and inspired choice of bad-guy casting for this otherwise bog-standard film. His main occupation is seemingly a terrorist/hijacker of planes, and he undoubtedly will not spare anyone’s life if it means him not being able to achieve his aims and objectives.

Anton Chigurh 7. ANTON CHIGURH (NO COUNTRY FOR OLD MEN).

Played by Javier Bardem in No Country For Old Men, Chigurh can only be described as a ruthless, relentless, compassionless, unmerciful killing machine — he will not stop! His main weapon of choice is a cattle gun and he kills his victims through a cylinder shot powered by compressed air. Moreover, for those of us that Chigurh doesn’t feel deserve to still be walking this earth, he flips a coin to decide their fate.

Richard Gecko 8. RICHARD GECKO (FROM DUSK TILL DAWN).

Played by Quentin Tarantino in From Dusk Till Dawn, Richard Gecko, one of two brothers, is a bank robber, kidnapper, mass murderer, serial rapist… oh, and a slayer of vampires! Despite being played by predominantly a writer/director of films, the life that this Gecko brother pumps into the film is simply exhilarating — a character has been born!

Drexl 9. DREXL SPIVEY (TRUE ROMANCE).

Played by Gary Oldman in True Romance, Drexl is a pimp that seemingly makes a large amount of his money through narcotics-related business with an associate named Blue Lou Boyle. Despite not being in the same bracket as the serial killers/rapists of this list, it’s Drexl’s appearance (scars, teeth), mannerisms, general demeanour, and identity confusion that ultimately freak me out. I think it’s safe to say that he is a man with absolutely no cares in the world — a nihilist like no other!

Kakihara 10. KAKIHARA (ICHI THE KILLER).

Played by Tadanobu Asano in Ichi the Killer, I still to this day do not know what this man is all about. How do you hurt a man who doesn’t feel pain? Throughout the film we are subjected to his self-inflicted injuries, from which he derives ultimate pleasure, and we can quite clearly see, as an audience, that his mouth/jaw is somehow kept intact by intricately placed jewellery which seems to stop the bottom half of his face from falling down. I assume he has done this to himself, which is why he is on my list!

Written by Conley Low

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